Writing Challenge: "Laughs at the Library"

This is the second writing challenge posed to me by Chris and Jerri Schlenker from my "Beginning Writer's Workshop" course:

LAUGHS AT THE LIBRARY

There are several reasons why our local library is one of my favorite places. For starters, the dusty scent of old tomes combined with that of fresh paperbacks sends me reeling back to my childhood. So do the helpful librarians, several of whom I’ve known since then. Of late, however, my newest reason to love the library is Junior High Game Day. I know what some of you are thinking: “Junior high kids are actually fun?” 

Yes, indeed. One day per month, our librarians invite local children from sixth to eighth grade over to play board games. There are several, including chess, Apples to Apples (a perennial favorite), Monopoly (with electronic banking so you don’t have to perform the arduous task of making change), Twister (which I never play for fear of breaking one or more of my appendages), and Trivial Pursuit (very rarely utilized). 

This last is because the questions are way too hard for post-Millennials: “Who was the first U.S. President to ride in a car?” One kid’s answer: “George Bush!” I pointed out that automobiles were invented in the late 1800’s, not the early 2000’s, so he bravely gave it another try: “Abraham Lincoln!” The actual answer is William McKinley. I confess that the only other thing I know about him is that he was assassinated by a Polish man named Leon Czolgosz. If I have my Slavic pronunciation right, that’s “tsol-GOSH.” The only reason I recall that is because of his last name. I’ve tried to master Russian and failed, so there you go. 

Anyway, that’s why we don’t play Trivial Pursuit. Another big hit at Junior High Game Day, at least when I remember to bring it, is Crappy Birthday. I have no idea if that’s because the gifts depicted on the game cards are so funny, or because the kids are legally allowed to say “crappy” at the library. Perhaps both. Each kid takes turns being the “birthday boy” or “birthday girl”, who is a judge of sorts. All the other kids have five “gift cards” in their hand, depicting horrible presents such as forty gallons of nacho cheese, a decorative urinal, a peeing statue, and so on. The player with the “birthday” has to pick the present they would hate to receive the most. The kid who had that card in his or her hand gets a point. Five points wins. 

“What’s a ‘bid-it’?” asked one boy (not the same one who guessed “George Bush” for the Trivial Pursuit question). He held up a card showing what looked like a large toilet. Blushing a little, I explained that the word was pronounced bidet, and it was “a special toilet that washes you after you go to the bathroom.” Immediately, another boy cried, “I want it! I want it!” Everybody else cracked up, including me. “Who wouldn’t want that? That’s a great present!” he added. More guffaws. Yes, this is a true story as well. 


Such laughs at the library!